Maintenance, reassurance, reset spankings, whatever you call them (oops, I used the word!). They are the subject of many discussions on many blogs and play an integral part of many dd relationships.
I understand the reasons for doing them and have wondered how this would work for us. How I would feel/react to them, would they help stop me from getting into major trouble, would they bring us closer together (if that is even possible) etc. Fortunately for me (depending on how you view maintenance) this has not been a feature of our relationship ...... until now that is!
But wait ... this is a different kind of maintenance which is why I thought it might make an interesting post.
My husband has always struggled with the idea of spanking with no infraction. I am also not sure whether he thought maintenance spankings may detract from punishment spankings when they occur.
Well, it seems he has been giving this some further thought. He recently announced he has decided to incorporate maintenance into our relationship - but with a difference.
We are to hold regular "discussions" about our relationship, my behaviour, whether I have broken any rules etc. At the end of these discussions if there has been any rule breaking, inappropriate behaviour etc, it will be addressed with a spanking and if there have been no issues no punishment will be metered. (I can hear the jealous cries of all you spank- nos now!). He said it is also an opportunity for encouragement and praise (nice guy eh).
My husband still doesn't believe in spanking without infraction (isn't he a real sweetie) But, he says this will 'force' us (for want of a better word) to focus on our relationship, enforce our roles in ttwd and ensure I am held accountable for any mistakes. Also, knowing that these discussions will be held and that I will be held accountable for my actions should serve as a reminder for me to follow the rules - hmm, I certainly hope so!
This does not mean that punishments for any infractions will be held over until maintenance, these will still ideally occur as soon as possible. Simply that infractions will not fall under the radar as it were (as has happened occasionally previously).
I still not entirely sure how I feel about this. Sitting down and analysing/discussing my behaviour, but I think this could really work for us. It is early days and we have only had one (thankfully painless) session so far.
I guess regular (again, for want of a better word) maintenance includes the discussion/lecture, but with a spanking attached to it. Is a spanking required to remind me to follow the rules, enforce our roles and to enhance the closeness between us? I guess we will find out.